What to do when children say, ‘I’m Bored’ – my feature in the Northwest Florida Daily News

I was featured in the Sunday, July 12, 2015 lifestyle section of the Northwest Florida Daily newspaper for this piece I wrote on dealing with children who say they are “bored.”  This was inspired by actual events and real conversation.  Below is the full article.  I’m placing it here since the newspaper did not publish it online. 

“Mommy, I’m bored!” my seven year old daughter uttered in an exaggerated tone.  This was only one week after school had closed for the summer.

I glanced at the clock.  The time was not even 8:00 a.m. on a Saturday.  This was the second week in June of our summer vacation.  Already my oldest daughter was complaining.  I looked around the house.  She had toys and games strewn all over the floor and even poking out the sofa and beneath the beds.

I had to count to three and take a deep breath so I would not lose it.  What should I do for my privileged, lucky child and her younger sibling?

“Go grab a sheet of paper and a pen,” I said to her.

“Can’t I just watch TV or play my Minecraft game?” she pleaded.

“No,” I replied.  “Grab two sheets of paper.” I said firmly.

I calmed myself down from disgust.  I wasn’t sure what I’d have her do with those sheets of paper.

Write lines for me?  No, I’m not a teacher and she is not punished.

Compose spelling words?  Practice addition and subtraction?  No, we both needed a break from schoolwork.

Finally the idea came to me.  I did not have to figure out how to prevent my kid’s boredom.  She can do that for herself.

She sat at the kitchen table with her supplies waiting for my instructions.  My daughter did not look thrilled.

I reassured myself I was doing the right thing.  Then I spoke to my child in a rational voice.

“You and your sister have no reason to feel bored,” I said to her.  “You have a room full of games, books, activities and toys.  You have an imagination.  You have a backyard.  I want you to use these sheets of paper to make a list of activities to do so you will not be bored again.  Fill this sheet with your ideas.  Then bring it to me to review.”

She whined and protested a bit.  I ignored her and continued on with my thoughts.
“When you’re done, cut out the list of suggestions.  We will find a place to keep them, probably inside a container.  Then anytime you feel there is nothing to do, you will pull an idea from there.”

“Do I have to?” she asked as a last resort.

I told her I could make her list for her but that she would not like my ideas.  Suggestions that came to my mind were folding laundry, taking out the trash, cleaning bathroom mirrors and more.

“Okay, I’ll start my list,” my daughter agreed.

She spent a half-hour composing her initiatives.   After she was finished, she handed me the list.  Her ideas were book reading, playing with stuffed animals, putting together puzzles, and more than a dozen other games or activities.  I was pleased with her list and suggested just a handful more that she could include.

My daughter cut out her list.  We then folded up the small sheets of paper and placed them in a plastic container to keep on the table.

Not long after that her attitude changed.  By involving her in the activity process, she seemed excited to pull from the activity box to see what she could do.  The first strip of paper said, “play with stuffed animals.” So she and her sister went off to their room to locate all thirty or more of their toys, including some that were stuck beneath the couch, to have some imaginary role playing with them.

An hour and a half later, my girls finally stopped playing and asked for a snack.  I call that a success.

Enjoy your summer.  I know I am.  I haven’t heard my oldest daughter say she was bored since then.