2015: The Year I Asked

Ask and ye shall receive.  Is that how the ancient saying goes?  As I look back upon 2015, I realize this past year has been remarkable.  For once my laundry list of achievements is more than simply folding and putting away loads of towels, light, and dark clothing.  My portfolio has pages of listings worth viewing.

What has made the difference?  Why did this year break down barriers for me, allowing me to thrive more professionally and personally?  To summarize, 2015 was the year that I asked.

The past twelve months I asked four main questions over and over again.  These inquiries caused the force to awaken in me.

1. Ask to be mentored.
After feeling stagnant for a long period, I devoted efforts to finding mentors.  I looked around at the resources and people in my network.  Who did I want to meet?  Who is doing the type of outreach that I want to do as well?  Once I determined that, I wrote emails, made phone calls, and showed up at events where I could bump into those professionals I wished to emulate.  Some mentors responded within the same day of me writing him or her.  Others took over two months to respond back.  I did not let the lapsed time discourage me.  I scheduled a meeting or lunch with anyone who could teach me.  Each person added value, even if the outcome led to a disappointment or painstaking lesson.

2. Ask for forgiveness.
I fell behind in a duty. My budget reporting went off schedule.  I messed up and could have offered several excuses. Instead I admitted my mistake right away.  I asked for forgiveness and for direct training to help me through the fiscal requirements.  Within a week, I received the training I needed and fixed the financial errors.  Feeling relieved and grateful from the experience, I then took the lesson into my personal life.  After a long family feud and period of silence, I asked several relatives I had wronged to forgive me.  I admitted I had acted foolishly in the past but was ready to move on and reconnect.  Luckily, those people gave me a second chance as well.  We make blunders.  Ask for a pardon and perform better the next round.  Forgive yourself and move on.  There is more vital work to be done.

3. Ask for time off.
Vacation all I ever wanted.  Vacation had to get away.  I can picture the Go-Go’s singing and skiing in their 1982 music video.  Yet that’s not the type of time off I took in 2015.  In fact I didn’t even take a full week off from work this year.  Instead I took many half-days.  I came in two hours later or left two hours earlier.  My husband and I scheduled day-dates and spent our time eating out, seeing a movie, and just generally enjoying each other’s company while our children were in school or day care.  I obtained my kid’s special events school calendar earlier this year so I could take off for the Turkey Trot, Veteran’s Day Program and other special parties.  I even took hours to myself.  On several occasions I told no one my plans for sitting inside a coffee shop so I could read a book, people-watch, and simply enjoy the peace.  These short mental health days really helped me throughout the year.  Each mini break fueled me to be  ready for the next task.

4. Ask how to help.
Once I found mentors, forgave myself for oversights, and took regular, short retreats, I had the energy and determination to help others.  I could stop looking inward and focus externally with clearer eyes.  So many others need assistance.  How could I help?  That was the question I began to ask those around me.  As I heard colleagues, friends or even strangers pose a challenge or reveal a hardship, I asked what I could to do aid the situation.  In some cases, I could provide a solution or formulate a plan.  Other times, just offering support made the individual feel better.  Help can come in so many ways – time, a meal, a conversation, or a monetary donation.  Look around.  Find a way to give back.

What will I ask for in 2016?  Oh the endless possibilities exist… I do not have the questions written down yet.  I believe they will come to me as time unfolds.  My only goal is to continue asking.  I receive far more than I hoped for when I do.